The Art of Dating Yourself: The Expression of Self Love

Happy Galentine's Day 💖

It is beautiful that February 13th is officially recognized as a day for women to celebrate self- and platonic love.

It comes back to a personal take on how women - being the nurturing and emotional creatures that we are - constantly seek community and find ways to build this within and amongst themselves.

Undoubtedly, we need other sources of feminine energy to fill our cups. Michelle Obama talks about this in her podcast with Jay Shetty, explicitly sharing how she'd navigated her romantic relationship with Barrack. Our romantic partners just won't be able to do certain things for us, and that's okay. On that same note, there are certain things that even people in our extended community won't be able to help us with. And this is where our relationship with ourselves is so meaningful.

I have spent a lot of time getting to know myself, my values, needs, wants, and desires - all of it. This has come from intentional time exploring my thoughts, ambitions, and desires.

I know we've all heard the quote, "Don't wait for other people to start living your life," and that is something I had to learn to adapt. I used to hate having to do things on my own, whether waiting for someone to go with me to a new restaurant, check out a new bar, or even just attend an event with me.

It took me some time to grow the confidence to start venturing alone, but it was like a snowball effect once I began. I've eaten alone at restaurants, solo traveled, and most recently, even attended an event at a club alone (this one was a little nerve-wracking).

However, every time I have allowed myself to venture into something new alone, I've always gained a new level of confidence that has further helped me in many other areas of my life. One of the most significant skills I've learned is starting conversations with anybody. This has assisted me in my career path, especially as I attend networking events and talk to fantastic people doing incredible things.

The world becomes less intimidating once you allow yourself to venture into new experiences. This requires working on yourself to know you're safe physically, emotionally, mentally, and intuitively.

This has meant jumping into the deep end and seeing if I survive. But also knowing I'll still be okay if I don't get the exact outcome I want. I've built this confidence by facing my fears in several ways:

• Getting okay with rejection

• Questioning my hesitations around exploring a new venture and realizing the pros almost always outweigh the cons

• Taking time to reflect on what went well and what didn't from previous risks taken

• Living by this belief of taking on every opportunity that comes my way

It might sound silly, but this has all resulted from allowing myself to explore life alone in some parts. More women, especially women of color, should be allowed to explore the world. It takes time to learn to navigate what feels right and safe to you, but the more you let yourself out of your comfort zone, the more you learn about your own limits.